How to Peg Your Man for the First Time It's not something you should rush into.

There’s so much swag and accessories that goes along with pegging, it’s easy to skip past all the stuff you need to know in order to deal with how to try pegging and go straight for the shopping trips to get ready to peg your man for the first time. While the shopping is all well and good, there are 5 things you should know about your adventure into the wonderful world of pegging. We’re hoping to make your journey enjoyable for all parties involved.

Create a plan of action to peg your man.

So, your boyfriend casually mentions that he wants to try pegging. Here’s what NOT to do.  Do not go out, buy the biggest strap-on dildo you can find and then stick it right up his bottom. Casually mentioning a desire to explore – and actually following through with it – are very, very different things. Before the two of you start pegging, you need to talk.

Find out how much knowledge and experience he has, if any at all. Talk about any concerns or insecurities that might accompany his desire to be pegged. You might feel insecure when asked to peg your man, believing that they aren’t satisfying their partner. But the pleasure men experience from prostate stimulation is simply different than what they enjoy from standard intercourse. Getting these conversations out of the way before you get started will make you both more comfortable and happy going in. Set up a plan of action going forward – schedule a trip to shop together, and to set up different sessions to explore pegging.

Start small.

Unless your man has a lot of experience with pegging, you will want to start off with a butt plug, toy or finger that is on the smaller size. Also remember it must have a flared base, where it’s wider at the top than where it goes in or it will easily just be swallowed alive. If this is the first time your partner has ever had anything put inside his butt, it’s a dangerous idea to leap straight to a full pegging. It’s dangerous for him because it can be painful, and it’s dangerous for you because you don’t know how much speed and force to use without causing your partner pain or tearing.

Before you step into your newly acquired strap-on dildo, work your way up, starting with some humble play to help prepare him for what’s to come. It will also give YOU a great anatomy lesson. Using your fingers to explore inside him until you find the prostate and learning to stimulate it will be great knowledge to have when you actually peg your man.

Lube it up – always – before you peg your man.

When you are in the heat of the moment, it is easy to forget lube; plus, if your partner seems open, you might think he doesn’t need lube at all. When it comes to pegging – or any kind of anal sex – the more lube, the better.  The human anus has not one, but TWO sets of sphincters.  There are the sphincters we can see externally, and then a second set deeper inside the anus.

Using lube makes your initial penetration through both sets of sphincters that much easier while creating a hot sense of friction.  Just make sure the kind of lube you have purchased is compatible with your toys. The silicone based lube you have for your own playtime won’t work with your all of your toys – we suggest buying specialty water-based lube to use with toys only. That prevents the toy’s material from breaking down and potentially leaking chemicals into his body or yours.

Talk dirty.

Pegging isn’t just the act of penetrating a man with a with a strap-on dildo – it’s an entire sexual experience. Men love pegging because of the stimulation it gives to their prostate, but some men also love the role reversal that takes place when it’s a woman doing the work. It goes to follow then, that you should make the most of that role reversal. You’re dominating him when you’re pegging him, so dominate him with your dirty talk too! Test the waters by asking him if he likes the way something feels – you won’t know until you try.  But don’t force it – if dirty talk while you peg isn’t for you, don’t pretend that it is.

Keep it clean when you peg your man.

You can be very dirty together and still remain hygienic. No toys that have been in his butt should ever go in your vagina unless they have been properly cleaned. Any bacteria that is picked up from the anus could be harmful to the vagina.

It’s also a good idea for him to anally douche with water before you begin to peg your man so that you have a fresh butthole to enjoy. Also, please remember to clean your sex toys before using them the first time, too! Fresh out of the package doesn’t always mean the thing is actually fresh. Safe is so much better than sorry, and if you do it right, you can turn your pre-washing of sex toys into a hot little foreplay game.

Ready to peg your man for the first time? Stop by the best adult products store in Tampa for adult toys, including strap-ons, vibrators and fetish toys. Our adult apparel line includes an extensive selection of lingerie, dancewear, shoes and costumes and much more!

Need some more dom/sub ideas? Check out our blog!

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Sexology 101

What Does a Man’s Zodiac Sign Say About His Sexual Fetish?

Since astrology maintains that our personalities are influenced by the stars, it only stands to reason that our sexual proclivities would also be affected by our zodiac sign.

If you’re in a sexual relationship, and are looking to spice things up in the bedroom, it may be time to take your partner’s sign into consideration. Read on to see what your significant other’s sign says about their preferences and kinks, and then consider whether or not you would be into experimenting with him.

Aquarians tend to dig on a little bit of voyeurism. If he’s allowed to feel like a bit of a sexual interloper, his blood will definitely get pumping. Perhaps let him watch from across the room as you get busy with yourself, or undress as though you’re unaware of his presence.

Pisces are ruled by the feet, and while that does NOT automatically indicate a full-blown foot fetish, keeping (only) your high heels on during foreplay, or massaging his feet are definitely tricks to piquing his sexual interests.

Taurus is a very visual sign, so anything that allows him to drink you up, visually, is a definite plus. Go all out on some sassy lingerie and then perform a little striptease for him.

Aries guys often crave more exciting intercourse, so partaking in quickies in unusual locations will definitely spark his sexual fire. Even a quick round of car sex can satisfy his craving for more unusual sexual dalliances.

Geminis are big communicators, and known for being quite talkative. A Gemini guy will therefore greatly appreciate a little extra naughty communication in bed. So if you’re with a Gemini, be loud and proud with your dirty talk.

Cancers appreciate intimacy, so a lewd quickie is probably not going to cut it for him. However, that doesn’t mean you need to resort to the boring old missionary position, either. Try the spooning position – it’ll give you plenty of intimacy, along with some actual G-spot stimulation.

Leos like to be teased just a little bit. With a Leo guy, it’s all about the long game. If you know you’ll be seeing him in the evening, try sending him salacious texts at various points in the day. The anticipation will make the evening explosive.

Virgos ideal night probably involves a marathon sex session. Set aside an evening where neither one of you needs to get up early, and designate the entire evening to foreplay.

Libras – with their love for all things beautiful – have an affinity for the natural light that accompanies morning sex. If you’re with a Libra, there’s a good chance that he’ll be eager to have sex once the alarm goes off.

Scorpios are known for their intensity, so race-to-the-finish-line sex is not their cup of tea. A Scorpio guy wants slow-burn sex – the kind where you get up intermittently during foreplay and go eat, or talk, or take a walk. It may sound crazy, but he’ll love relishing in the sexual tension all evening.

Sagittarius is all about spontaneity. For him, exciting sex is the best sex, and the most exciting sex is the surprise variety. If you’re watching TV together, perhaps lean over and start going down on him. The more you keep him on his toes, the more enamored he will be.

Capricorns – ruled by the teeth – are the most open to the idea of incorporating food into foreplay. Whether it’s feeding each other, or licking each other, adding some edibles into the mix will heighten their senses and their sex drive.

Give it a try…you never know…his fetish may very well become yours too.

Check out our follow up article on The 9 most common sexual fetishes!

 

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Uncategorized

Labor Day: Time for Some Hot End-of-Summer Sex!

Labor Day weekend is essentially a going-away party for summer. And just like any goodbye, there are some seriously mixed emotions involved. Some will welcome it with open arms, excited for the coming days of sweaters, scarves, and pumpkin spice lattes, others will mourn the loss of beach days and barbecues. Whichever group you fall into, one thing’s for certain – it’s time to have some very hot end-of-summer sex.

It’s a little tradition we have as a country to cram all the summer experiences we can’t leave behind into one action-packed three-day weekend. So in addition to the barbecues, weekend getaways, hotel stays – and much-needed staycations – here are a few sexual experiences to help you make the most of the last weekend of summer.

  1. Get Busy Outside: Why waste your weekend indoors when you have fall and winter for that? Outdoor sex is actually a common fantasy, and the change of locale (for some, paired with the fear of being caught) can add a sexy adrenaline rush. Plus, getting busy outdoors forces you to break from your routine and adapt to your new surroundings. Take advantage of the warm weather while we still have it and go camping, take a hike, or find a secluded beach and hook up in some fresh air.
  1. Park the Car: Road trips are a staple of summer fun and remind us of being young and carefree. Sex acts of any kind in a moving vehicle are an absolute no-no, but if you’re cruising with your partner and a sexy thought crosses your mind, pull over. When you stop somewhere private, slowly let your hand creep up your partner’s leg, or place his hand on your leg. Plant a few kisses on his neck and he’ll definitely get the idea. Once the teasing gets too much, kill the engine, recline the passenger seat, and, you know the rest.
  1. Take a Dip: While oceans, lakes, and swimming pools may seem like the perfect place to sneak in a quickie, fully submerged sex puts you at risk for all kinds of infections, not to mention that the water can wash away your natural lubrication. For a risk-free but equally sexy water experience, head to your shower with your favorite waterproof toys. It’s the perfect spot because the limited space requires you to get creative with your sex positions, there’s no cleanup, and cool water actually heats up your sex drive by stimulating circulation. Finish it off with a relaxing massage!
  1. Foreplay All Day: Part of the appeal of a long weekend is that it gives you plenty of time to extend your pleasure and get the most out of every sexual act. You know those delicious moments leading up to sex? Imagine if you could prolong all that sexual tension for as much time as you want. Remove one sense, like sight for example, to heighten all the others and put you into sensual overdrive. Bring a blindfold into the mix to really turn up the sizzle. Take turns touching each other until you’re both so hot, there’s nothing left to do but get it on.
  1. Cross at Least One Thing Off Your Sexual Bucket List: Whether it’s a change of locale, a new sex position, or a kinky role-play scenario, take advantage of this long weekend to mix things up and explore uncharted territory in your sex life. If there’s something you have always wanted to try, now is your chance to suggest something sexier than dinner and a movie.

Go forth and have the sexiest Labor Day ever!

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Sexology 101

Bondage Role-Play: Our Favorites

Bondage role-play is an exciting way to explore the pleasurable pain of this fetish. Especially for those of you who are just discovering the benefits of BDSM, experiencing it through role-play is a great way to get a feel for it one step at a time.   After all, during role-play, we can use our imagination to be anyone at all, which makes it easier to step outside our comfort zones.

Following are some of our favorite scenarios.

  1. Nurse and Patient. The sexy fantasy of a seductive nurse is a story as old as time. With the closeness to medical instruments and a legitimate need to put your hands all over the patient’s body, this scenario is begging to be used in bondage role-play. Just imagine, if your patient gets a little out of hand, you might just have to strap him or her to the table to check the vitals. Now that is one naughty bedside manner!
  1. Student and Teacher. Act out sexy bondage role-play in the classroom when you’re dressed as the class troublemaker. If you’ve been disrupting class by speaking out of turn, there’s only one way to deal with that – the teacher will have to chastise you with a paddle or a ruler. You may even be forced to sit in the corner and do as you’re told, and who knows what kind of punishment could be in store for you?
  1. Sexy French Maid. Fine tune that French accent, dress up in your sexy maid uniform and get ready to service your partner like never before. “Ooh-la-la” and “merci” are just two expressions he or she will be saying when it becomes clear what you have in store for as a sultry French maid! This role-play is more than just a wild dream come true for your partner. You can be as demanding or as giving as you wish, depending on what kind of mood you want to set.
  1. The Watcher. One of our favorite bondage role-play scenarios includes one partner doing all the work, while the other partner is made to just watch. Restrain the watching partner to the bed, and then begin to play by going about your day normally – dressed in nothing but a thong. The key is to completely ignore the watching partner. Don’t even look at them. When you finally, allow yourselves to actually touch each other…let’s just say it’s probably going to be explosive!
  1. Catsuit Passion. Who wouldn’t want to channel the ultra sleek sexiness of Catwoman? Make it bondage role-play by wearing a sexy leather and lace catsuit, and bring along a whip to ensure you can put your partner right into line at a moment’s notice! Is a whip not quite enough for you? A sturdy suede flogger, riding crop, or chain ball tickler all match the sexy outfit as much as the situation.
  1. Fifty Shades of Grey. If you’re totally new to bondage or role-play, you at least know about Fifty Shades of Grey. Make it even more exciting to explore this fetish by taking on the roles of Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele. He may not always play by the BDSM rules, but you and your partner should, which means never forsaking the power of the safe word.

Slipping on a new personality in the bedroom allows us to let go of anxious self-consciousness a little bit more easily, which makes scouting new sexual territory through bondage role-play seem much more doable. Spice it up even more with just the right erotic lingerie or adult sex toys for your bondage role-play needs.

 

 

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Sexology 101

BDSM for Stress Relief?

While bondage, domination, and sadomasochism have seen steadily increasing acceptance in our mainstream culture, it’s natural for people to wonder just what the allure is of this somewhat scary sexual phenomenon. But the truth is that when engaging in BDSM with a trusted and consenting partner, there’s nothing at all to fear and quite a bit to gain!

Research has indicated that engaging in BDSM can offer health benefits that extend beyond sexual satisfaction, including stress reduction. Of the people studied who practice and enjoy BDSM, certain mental traits were shared, such as being less phobic, more outgoing, open to new experiences and less sensitive to rejection.

So how does it reduce stress?

There is actually a scientific reason, and it’s similar to a runner’s high. Submissive partners enjoy a relaxed, peaceful sense of mind, while dominants experience their own endorphin-filled version, which is coupled with an increased sense of control and success.

Studies also included saliva samples that were taken of people engaging in BDSM before, during, and after the act. In both the submissive and dominant partners, lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol were reported after participating.

Can BDSM actually increase intimacy?

Exploring each other’s fetishes is an important component of any relationship and a partner’s willingness to explore and then act on their partner’s desires is vital when establishing and growing their connection. Additionally, the intense level of communication during BDSM creates a greater sense of trust in each other, which is the true foundation of honest intimacy.

That said, the benefits of BDSM can be enjoyed in endless ways. Browse our entire collection of fetish toys to find the perfect introduction to exploring BDSM.

Restraints: What’s BDSM without restraints? Tease your lover to your delight with the Fetish Fantasy Under the Bed Restraints. The unit installs between the mattress and box spring of your bed. Ankle and wrist cuffs extend out of the head and foot of the bed.

Paddles: Also popular is the painful pleasure that is derived from spanking. Try our ruler with a perfect grip for spanking. We also have a Beginner’s Paddle or the Sex & Mischief Paddle for the more advanced.

Gags: Want to dive into BDSM with a little more intensely? Try our Breathable Ball Gag, which features a unique cylinder shape, as well as just enough breathing holes to provide a bit of comfort in this otherwise restraining piece. The length is adjustable so it will fit almost anyone.

Spice up your fetish play life with just the right adult sex toys – from blindfolds and gags to restraints and whips – and erotic lingerie. Browse the fetish collection or find your passion among corsets, role-play costumes, or body stockings – all available at the premier adult store in Tampa – Everything Sexy 4 Play!

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Sexology 101

How to Discuss Sex With Your Partner

Let’s face it – talking about sex with your partner (or anyone for that matter) can be awkward. Not only are you uncomfortable talking to your friends about the subject, but it can be even harder to talk about sex with your partner because you worry what they’ll think. Will they laugh…be disgusted…how do you even bring it up…how do you talk about sex with your partner??

Take a deep breath. Yes – they might laugh or be surprised – but they also might be totally into it. They may have been waiting for you to raise the topic because they were also nervous and or uncomfortable. Many times our worst-case scenarios don’t happen and what could very well happen is a sexy conversation about your desires.

Embrace the awkward. This topic can be especially difficult if you’ve never discussed it before, but it gets a bit easier with time. Many sex educators even struggle to talk to their own partner(s) about sex.

Have the talk anyway. Swallow your pride and just dive right in. Talking about sex helps you have better sex and stronger relationships because when you do so you build intimacy by learning about each other’s deepest desires. You also give them permission to talk about these things with you. Lastly, you get new ideas. Maybe your partner wants to try something you never thought about before. In short, these conversations help you have a more intimate, adventurous, and satisfying sex life.

5 Ways To Talk To Your Partner About Sex

See, discussing sex doesn’t have to be so difficult – when you are ready to talk to your partner about sex, here are 5 ways to make the conversation easier.

  1. Use this blog post as a reason to start the discussion.Books and blogs are some of the best sex conversation starters. They are so easy to work in by saying, “Hey I was reading this thing today….” like you would any other interesting news.
  1. Talk about one topic at a time. Once you get started talking about sex, it’s easy to want to share everything at once. Don’t. Choose the one that is most important to you and only talk about that. There’s no right or wrong answer – it’s whatever you need to talk about the most.
  1. Know what to discuss when. There are things you talk about during sex and things you talk about once you’re clothes are back on and the blood has returned to your brain. If it’s not on this list, wait until you’re fully clothed to bring it up.
  • Ask permission.
  • Give guidance.
  • Express appreciation.
  • Check-in.
  • Give positive suggestions.
  • Talk dirty.
  • Share if something hurts or feels uncomfortable.
  1. Define what you mean. A lot of things done during sex can have multiple meanings that differ from its actual definition. So let your partner know exactly what you mean when you suggest something.
  1. Avoid yes or no questions. Nothing stops a sex conversation faster than “Have you heard of X?” Instead, try asking what they think about X and only then ask if they are interested in trying it. Let the conversation flow from there – if you don’t ask, you’ll never know!

We can’t promise your partner will be into the same desires as you or that feelings won’t get hurt, but we do know that your desires will never get fulfilled if you don’t take a chance and ask.

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Sexology 101

Sex Toys: Not Just for Solo Fun!

Often thought of as a solo activity, the use of sex toys by couples can enhance their sexual relationship. Using a sex toy is a great way to spice up your sexual relationship while boosting intimacy. There are multiple benefits of using sex toys, including keeping your Kegel muscles toned and your libido amped up.

Why should you use a sex toy?

The benefits of using a sex toy are vast. Having great sex can promote health and wellbeing by elevating your mood and making you feel good physically. Using a sex toy can spice up a fading sex life and bring some fun into your life. A sex toy not only makes you feel great but it improves your circulation and the release of the “feel good factors” during orgasm.

Sex toys can also increase the tone and elasticity of the vaginal walls and stimulate the release of vaginal secretions that can decline as we get older, as a result of bad health or side effects of medication.

Using a sex toy can bring great pleasure to both partners even if full intercourse is not possible. Many couples are unable to have sex due to physical or emotional problems and using a sex toy may help.

Will it ruin my normal sex life?

When used with your partner, sex toys provide couples with the opportunity to fully express themselves sexually and enhance their sexual pleasure, especially when using them to stimulate their partner.

Couples can use sex toys to boost their sexual satisfaction and add variety into their sexual relationship, which may have become boring. Having sex with the same person for many years can become a bit stale but a sex toy can help to make sexual intercourse more fun, pleasurable and exciting again. Becoming aroused with the help of a sex toy is no different than any other way and may increase your pleasure.

I want to but I’m too embarrassed.

Since the famous rabbit vibrator was mentioned on “Sex and the City” it has become acceptable to own sex toys. According to recent statistics, nearly 60% of women own a sex toy and 75% of those who do are married. You may be surprised at how many of your friends own a toy, as it’s normally the quiet ones!

My partner isn’t on board.

If your partner isn’t keen on you using a sex toy, use it on your own or try to encourage them that using a sex toy is not replacing them but improving what you already share. It can increase trust and closeness between you and your partner.

I don’t want to scare my partner away.

Some men feel that they won’t match up to what a sex toy can do and can therefore be replaced by a vibrator. This couldn’t be more wrong. Using sex toys together enhances sexual pleasure for both people involved.

There is no single sex toy that is right for everyone. We all have different sexual needs and experimenting with a variety of products will enable you to find the perfect toys for you. There are many sex toys available for both sexes that provide enormous pleasure. If you have a bad experience with one toy, don’t give up, just try something else. You may find that once you have persuaded your partner to try a sex toy, they will be hooked and will want to try more.

Now stop worrying that using a sex toy can ruin your sex life, because it will only enhance your pleasure and promote good sexual health.

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Sexology 101

What Makes Sex Great?

People always seem to be in search of great sex. Magazine and blogs are filled with articles detailing the supposedly few simple things that people can do to make it happen. And sometimes these sex tips are promoted as if there is some secret information that can be shared and you will magically start having great sex. The problem is that the idea of great sex is subjective and changes from person to person.

While we’re all unique, there are some common feelings as to what constitutes great sex. Is the length and intensity of the orgasm, or could it be the number of orgasms that defines great sex?

Maybe great sex relates to how much we’re turned on. Or maybe it’s because of the spontaneity factor, the break from the normal routine or the fact that you’re having it with a new partner that makes it so good. So what makes great sex great?

It all starts with passion, desire and enthusiasm! If you’re ‘into’ someone (whether it’s love, lust or simply infatuation) and you’re turned on, then you’re on your way towards great sex. But it all needs to start with passion that is similar to youthful exuberance.

Unlike men, women typically need an emotional connection in order for them to enjoy great sex. Without an emotional connection, it simply comes down to lust, and at times that’s simply not enough. Sure most of us have probably had great sex with a stranger, a one-night stand or a friend with benefits, but this is not the norm.

Sometimes the first few times a couple has sex it can be uncomfortable or even awkward. And it’s not because they’re not turned on; it’s usually because they’re trying too hard. In some cases, one or both partners aren’t aware of what really turns their partner on or what leaves them quivering in ecstasy.

With time and communication (both verbally and with body language), they learn what the other needs for maximum sexual pleasure. Many couples find that the ability for great sex increases as the relationship matures.

Think of it like fine wine. Over time, and in the right conditions some wines get better after a few years. Unfortunately, however, it can plateau over time and from there it’s all downhill. There’s not much you can do when this starts happening to the wine you’ve had in your cellar for a few years other than quickly drink it, give it away or watch it depreciate even more. Fortunately when your sex life hits a plateau, you can stop the decline and get it back on track to the point of once again being great.

Can you have great sex alone with masturbation or using sex toys? Absolutely! In fact, sometimes it’s just what’s needed. Can sex be great sex without actual penetration? Sure! Oral sex, sexless sex and mutual masturbation can all be great sex!

The bottom line is that there are no rules as to what defines great sex. You and your partner just have to explore and experience your way to ecstasy!

 

 

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Sexology 101

The Fascination with Restraints

While the sale of sex toys skyrocketed in the months following the release of 50 Shades of Grey, it was the huge boost in the sale of restraints and blindfolds that took the adult industry by surprise. Apparently there are a lot of people who are either into – or want to experiment with – bondage and restraints, both with and without discipline. It appears that the trilogy helped normalize a type of behavior that most people previously thought was too kinky to even consider.

So what actually qualifies as a restraint? The reality is that holding your partner down with the weight of your body, or physically grabbing their arms or hands, is a fairly common method of restraint. The next level of restraints may include use of a necktie, scarf or handcuffs. At a more advanced level there are restraints like rope, chain, leather apparatus, ball gags, masks and bondage tape.

So what makes restraints so exciting? Many adults find it liberating to hand over control to their partner. This exchange of power and surrendering of control can awaken and heighten the sensations for both the submissive person and the dominant one. While applying restraints is often used during foreplay, it doesn’t always lead to sex. In fact, simply seeing someone restrained can be sexually stimulating!

What should you do before engaging in restraint play? Unless you know that your partner really wants to do it, you should talk it through to determine acceptable boundaries before you begin and agree on a safe-word. If you’re new to experimenting with restraint play, you should begin slowly to gain trust.

So what happens after a sub (submissive party) has been restrained? There should be eagerness, anticipation and a little fear of the unknown, accompanied by some abandonment of inhibitions and an abundance of lust. If there is some role-play, either or both participants might be dressed in leather, latex, rubber, stockings or other fantasy wear. Often restraint is part of a sexual fantasy so if the atmosphere is right, the experience can be exhilarating and sexually rewarding for all.

Is there always discipline involved? Not always, but the combination of pleasure and pain can be very sensual. When a sub is restrained it’s often their buttocks that are the focus of attention during disciplining. Their size and makeup enables them to endure a lot of punishment with little pain afterwards. Buttocks are often struck with a hand, paddle, flogger, whip or cane. (Obviously pain thresholds should be predetermined to ensure boundaries are not crossed.)

Sex toys such as vibrators, dongs and clitoral stimulators are often used on someone who is restrained, and watching a sub squirm in anticipation can be truly captivating. Having a variety of sex toys and other props to use on a sub can be very seductive, especially since the sub doesn’t have control over what’s being used and when.

For a Dom (dominant party), the power they feel knowing that they can pleasure the sub how and when they want is one of the reasons they get a high from the sex using restraints.

Role-play and bringing sexual fantasies into play is a great way to ensure sex between couples doesn’t become mundane or boring. If what you do is consensual and all parties enjoy it, why not get your restraints on?

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Sexology 101

Need tips for getting more sex?

Whether it’s once a year or more frequently, everyone should at times reassess where they are in life and perhaps re-evaluate what’s important. And if they have a partner, they should communicate what they want and what makes them happy. If it’s more sex, or if they want to try new things or start living out their sexual fantasies, they need to have that conversation.

There always needs to be a catalyst for change. If someone is not happy with their sex life, they need to do something about it.  Following are some tips to help you reach your sexual goals.

  1. Be honest and realistic with both yourself and your partner. Reassess your current sex life and discuss what you’re happy with, what you’re not happy with and what you’d like to change. Discuss your sexual fantasies and whether or not you’d like to act them out – or try, rediscover or buy – new sex toys.
  1. Make sure that your relationship is going smoothly. Unlike most men, women typically need to feel an emotional connection with their partner in order to enjoy sex. And that’s only going to happen when they feel loved and when they feel they’re in a stable relationship. Think about your relationship and evaluate any issues you may have; if you can work through them, it sets the stage for more sex.
  1. Boost your and your partner’s libido. Remember there’s a direct connection between your and your partner’s libido and exercise, diet and overall lifestyle. Being overweight, a bad diet, being overly stressed, drinking too much alcohol, smoking, not getting enough exercise or sleep etc., can adversely impact your libido. If either you or your partner has a low libido, it doesn’t bode well for having more – or better – sex.
  1. Plan regular date nights. Most of us have busy lives these days so it’s important to plan regular times when you and your partner can have some time to yourselves without friends, kids or other distractions. This time together spent reconnecting can set the stage for more sex. Weekends away from home are a great way to spice up your sex life!
  1. Show more affection. Having sex usually has some prerequisites such as affection, passion and intimacy. If you’re not happy with how much sex you’re having, consider showing a bit more affection – it’s a surefire aphrodisiac! Assess how much passion there is in your relationship and see how you can improve on it.
  1. Spice things up a bit. Maybe it’s time to revisit foreplay techniques, and the way you currently have sex, as sex can become monotonous if it’s the same each time. Try new positions – possibly introduce sex furniture – and get more adventurous.
  1. Start being nicer to your partner! Everyone likes to be given compliments and made to feel appreciated. It makes them feel good about themselves and the relationship they’re in. Women especially love compliments regarding how they look because it makes them feel sexy. And if they feel sexy, be prepared for more sex!

Life’s not all about having great sex, but let’s face it, a great sex life can help make us happy!