While I realize some of you might have landed here wondering how someone might not know how to masturbate, plenty of women have reached adulthood without mastering solo-loving techniques that work for them.
For those people, let me just say, relax, because it’s okay to have no idea what you’re doing. Men can touch their penis and then that’s that. Women have a whole situation going on down there that can be a lot harder to figure out. So today we’re sharing our masturbation tips for women.
Masturbation Tips for Women: Don’ts
Don’t masturbate like it’s something you have to accomplish or else. Make sure you have enough time to not feel rushed and have enough privacy to not be interrupted. If you only have five minutes or you’ve set aside a day like you need to get this figured out, odds are you’re going to be too stressed to allow the kind of no-pressure feeling you should ideally have when you’re masturbating, at least in the beginning.
Don’t feel like you have to start out by jackhammering your clit. Try some more low-key playful touching, like running your fingers along your inner labia and along the sides of your clitoris, all the way down toward the entrance of your vagina. It’s just a good starting point to get some blood flowing down there, which helps increase pleasure and arousal.
You don’t have to focus on the vagina and nothing but the vagina. Try bringing in nipple stimulation into masturbation, or grabbing your butt or upper thighs, just to see if any of that feels good to you. Part of that is just to get a sense of where you’re the most sensitive and what kind of touch feels best for you.You don’t have to just lie on your back. Lift your legs as high as possible (we’re talking knees on your shoulders here) to help you reach the internal parts of your clitoris, or turning on your stomach and seeing if that feels good to you. It’s harder to reach in that position, but some really love it, so why not try?
Masturbation Tips for Women: Dos
Use some lube. Use a quarter-size amount of lube onto your index and middle fingers, and gently massaging it around your clitoris (the little button-shaped thing at the top of your vagina) and inner labia (the folds inside the larger folds that make up most of your vagina).
You can use a vibrator, but you shouldn’t necessarily start with that. While you might have a better success rate with a sex toy, using your hands in the beginning can be a great way to learn about your body. Plus, it’s also more comparable to the sensations caused by a partner’s hands, so if you have any interest in partner sex, it’ll help you transition from one to the other more smoothly, and gives you information for your partner about how you like to be touched.
If you need visual aids, get them! The biggest sex organ is between the ears, so engage your brain as well. Remember sexy times from your past, check out arousing online images, or read erotica. Whatever you need to do to fuel that fire.
If you feel like you need someone to literally tell you what to do, here you go. Slide a finger between your lips to open things up and then get a little lube on your finger tips if more slickness would feel good. Slide your fingers back and forth from your vaginal opening to your clit. Don’t go inside yet, just tease yourself a bit. Try a stroke that is one finger at a time and then slide a couple fingers into your vagina, curling them slightly. Slide them in and out with gusto and try going in circular motions around the clitoris, rather than back-and-forth straight strokes. Make the circles as tight or as wide as you like to vary intensity.
Work some penetration into the mix if that feels right for you. Some women don’t use penetration at all when they’re masturbating, but if you want to try that, try slowly moving your fingers in and out of you while you continue to play with your clitoris.
So you have our masturbation tips for women…now go forth and masturbate a lot…you’re ready!
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